Sitting in the chair. Oh god, these are students! I was setting fire to couches when I was a student. What do they have in mind for the chair I'm in?
Today I'm given:
18 x-rays. Rubber dicks can't even survive this bombardment.
And then the diagnosis:
15 cavities, requiring 15 fillings. Some teeth with what they call, sarcastically, "multiples."
4 root canals needed. "Endodontics," or dildonics. Not sure which.
3 crowns.
2 crown "lengthenings".
And 40 visits in all.
Total: $5,505.00, "Worst case scenario." (His words).
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Letting strangers dance around in your mouth for three hours at a stretch with pointy dental tools.
2 comments:
Is this a true story? Yuck.
Wouldn't it be better/easier/more procrastinatory to just wait till they fall out and then get more put in?
My big problem (or one of them), getting dental treatment at NYU, was that I tended to violently gag when they were making "impressions" (models) of my teeth, for future guidance in their work on me (actually they eventually admitted that they were making more impressions than necessary, for the training of the students in impression-making). So if my throat/mouth started acting up, they had to start all over again with a new attempt at an Impression. I don't know if your case will involve a lot of (or any) impressions; I was having Implants made. (I had the Graduate department working on my mouth, not Undergraduates, because I was one of the hard cases). Some of the dentists working on me got all moralistic about my gagging ("you MUST not do this"), but one fellow had this great idea that whilst they made the impressions I should put my hand in front of my nose and then focus on the breath from my nostrils hitting the hand. That really worked. I was never told how many visits it was going to take--it was very open-ended, and went on at least 3 years--easily 40 visits or more. I was making partial payments all the way through, but they seem at the end to have forgiven some of the stated total charge; mysteriously their accounting suddenly changed to "all paid" when I was sure I still owed them a thousand dollars or so. I can't of course promise you that that will happen in your case. :)
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