NYU College of Destiny

Update....still no updates.

2009-09-14T19:38:00.000-07:00

I haven’t returned to the destiny school because we had a disagreement.

I fought with the personification of this destiny.

I can’t pay, so I’ve been canceling appointments I’ve been making.

One problem that has stemmed from this is that my dentist gets angry, but especially when this is done at the last minute, which I usually do, since I expect to have the money and then that falls through.

The sky is filled with white dwarfs, is a statement no one will ever say when a dentist is using them and/or angry at what’s being insinuated.

My dentist gets mad, basically, because I canceled at the last minute and I insisted that what he was insinuating was that I was a bad person because I didn’t have $300.

I made the debate about Calvinism.

Stinky ass beaches don't occupy my weekend plans.

This voice on the phone belonged to my dentist, now he hangs up.

Still no destiny...

2008-11-05T19:01:00.000-08:00

...but that's because I was busy being married and newlywed, if that's a verb I can use.

Something humorous from the wedding weekend that relates to destiny and teeth, though:

I was in Fellini's pizzeria the day I flew in (Thursday, wedding was Saturday). My wife and I were running around like junkies (I know, I know) busying ourselves with last-minute minutia. As I was in line waiting to pay hard-earned cash for my well-deserved slice, the persistent, if elusive, NYU College of Destiny (the SAME!) called me to ask if I would still like to continue my tenure as its (yes, an entity of destiny)patient and would I like to schedule a checkup?
I told them that I was getting married and that I couldn't talk right now much less schedule a renovation of my teeth. Soooo...the guy behind the counter must have thought I was talking to a collection agent -- marriage being my excuse not to discuss my burgeoning fame in the world of collection agencies -- because he gave me this I-don't-believe-you-just-used-that-as-an-excuse-now-I'm-going-to-use-that-as-an-excuse-thanks-peace-here's-your-pizza look. It was funny. You had to be there, I guess. Mangia!

More hiatus...

2008-08-22T20:50:00.001-07:00

...and because I'm a slacker, I still have a temporary cap on from...oh, I don't know...February?

Hiatus...

2008-06-03T18:19:00.000-07:00

My destinist graduated this month. I haven't seen him since February (as evidenced by the date of the previous post). I hope my replacement dentist has skillzzzzzz.
I hope they don't send me Buddy HACKett.

#25

2008-02-11T16:19:00.000-08:00

Time of Entry: 11:00 am

Exit: 5:00 pm.

I assume the chair at 3 pm. Now is exam time.
To fill #8 distal. The student is nervous,
but paces himself well. Please don't rush.
This will give him no need for watch.

He comes with an assistant. The assistant
is nervous. He wants to use his hands.
The watch blocks time to understand.
This will give him no need for salt.

#26

2008-02-06T20:04:00.000-08:00

Today today, Feb. 6, 2008.

Told my dentist that I'm now engaged. Fully.

We talked about the ethical conflict of dental exams: students there at the Destiny School must pay $2000 for an exam that requires they provide three candidates from their pool of patients. If the candidates aren't deemed worthy on the day of the exam (meaning, if the specific decay to be worked on isn't as bad as they diagnosed), the $2000 is lost. They must repay (and thus, retake) at a later time.

We talked about how easy it would be to tell patients to not brush so that they would get free fillings and such, since during exams all work is done pro bono.

Apparently, telling a patient not to take care of their teeth is unethical.

Jan. 14, 2008

2008-02-06T20:02:00.000-08:00

I haven't written in nearly a month. Today (The January 14th version of "today" -- only Doc Brown could fix that finicky flux capacitor) I had some x-rays. No biggie. I might qualify for a paid filling (yes, they'd pay me to sit in the chair agape).

Tenti-tation

2008-01-13T21:28:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow. 4 pm. It's been a month since I've had to sit in a dentist chair for a routine checkup and now I have to return.

Pshaw! I don't even care.

1.2.08 -Willkommen 2008! (Visit 28)

2008-01-02T10:34:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year NYU College of Destiny! Happy New Year -easy analogy- Orwell Chairs! Happy New Year Dental Dams! Spacers! Extraction trays! Nitrous Happy New Year!

My oral surgeon (not my dentist,hereafter, destinist) is under the impression that I love a raucous fiesta.

Me: I had a calm night. Not much drinking.
Him: Pfft. That's horrible, man.
Me: It's not too bad. In my experience, the worse the New Year's the better the year. At least to me.
Him: Well, mine was crazy. A calm New Year's is no fun. I was at this party -- four girls -- crazy party. When the ball was dropping, these girls -- you can see the ball drop from my friend's apartment -- at the stroke of midnight, four of them, were in the bathroom together all throwing up in one...thing..."

Willkommen 2008!

Extraction (Visit 29)

2008-01-02T10:31:00.000-08:00

Thursday, 12.14.07. 6 pm

Molar #14 was extracted today. Said tooth sized up to approx. 3/4 of an inch.

Imagine someone grabbing a part of your jaw -- a small part, say, about two cm in diameter total -- and applying the pressure needed to wrench a signpost from cement.

That's what this felt like.

30 b

2007-12-12T15:01:00.000-08:00

Extraction-o-rama

Buzzterm: "Manly ambition"

They (my doc and an assistant) made an attempt to pull molar 14 today, which has long been giving me trouble. This tooth was the initial reason I headed to NYU College of Destiny. Today they gave me three large shots of Novocaine, then lifted the gum around the tooth to remove it. What I didn't expect (neither did they) was the light-headedness. Novocaine contains ephedrine, which on an empty stomach, mimics the effects of anxiety. My pulse jumped and they were forced to stop the procedure, citing the underlying infection as the real reason they weren't able to extract.

So much for manly ambition in my teeth.

30

2007-12-12T15:00:00.001-08:00

Gutta percha removed in Root Canal numero uno to make way for post. It is determined that a cast post will fit.

31

2007-12-04T08:09:00.000-08:00

12.3.07, 5:00 pm

Root canal numero uno finished. Gutta percha is now lodged in my gum, to the root. GP is a polymer, and is used in latex. It's also used in my mouth.

Gutta percha's strength, melting point and bonding ability make it a good candidate for dental endodontics.

A painless experience, though invasive: scraping around in my head with what amounts --size wise-- to a trowel.

Cost: $450 (paid in 3 installments)

32

2007-11-26T20:30:00.001-08:00

11.20, 6 pm.

As a mock exam, my mouth is brought in for a routine filling. Only the cavity is deep, the anesthetic wears off, and I experience great sensitivity.

33

2007-11-20T08:11:00.001-08:00

11.19.07 (Last night, 6-8 pm)

Root canal on tooth 3 (right side, next to incisor). This is the technicality.

Root canal performed in 1.5 hours. I swallowed some of the bleach they used to irrigate the canal. My throat hurt for about 2 hours afterward.

I feel better today, except for a mild headache brought on by a few too many hot toddies (and no, there was no sensitivity).

My dentist is an ace magician.

34

2007-11-20T08:09:00.000-08:00

11.16.07/6 pm

Pre-molar #4 determined a non-threat. Filled with amalgam.

I feel no pain there. Doc says I'll need a crown in the future.

35

2007-11-13T08:16:00.000-08:00

11.13.07

Update. No root canal today.
I can't feel the needle anymore.
They're going to have to extract.

I'm given the options: bridges or implants.

Make it bigger, baby. I got hired because of my molars!

Update.

2007-11-07T21:40:00.001-08:00

11/12. Root canal in my future....

36 woulda been

2007-10-22T15:58:00.000-07:00

I had to call off the dentist today. Columbia has given me a big work/deadline smack in the middle of midterms. PUM!

The next set dental date is for this Thursday.

The penicillin (500mg/ every 6 hrs) makes my piss smell like I'm into asparagus more than I should be. That's "Wanderer's Dentistry Asparagus" to you, Melchior.

Very little swelling where the abscess was. They said the bleeding was fierce.

37

2007-10-19T13:41:00.000-07:00

Two x-rays today. I transfer up to the 7th floor. My post-grad dentist mentions that he's going to be taking care of the tooth, since it's a special case and a difficult root canal to (re)perform.
7th floor: The heavies are here. Post-grads in residence. I am declared a special case. He'll call the student dentist and inform him that Molar 14 is his.

Diagnosis: No perforation. But the canal must be addressed.

Appointments:
10/22 - Root Canal, pre-molar 4
11/13 - Root Canal, molar 14

38

2007-10-19T13:32:00.000-07:00

Thursday.

E-mergency. Abscessaroni. Abscessaringo. I have some inflaming in the upper facial back molar barrio. I get to the waiting room at 6:15. Out by 8:45.

How much of my life is spent in these chairs, discovering the hungry dumpling facade of Lou Dobbs and his "war on the middle class" rhetoric. Leek dumpling.

As it turns out, they might have "perforated" my molar when they canaled it the other day.

On perforation: occurs if the dentist performing the operative procedure (yes, a mouthful) happens to (accidentally) push too far down into the canal, sometimes causing the canaling tool to puncture the tooth (Tool moving diagonally out through the tooth. I wasn't sure if perforations are caused by the tool, or by the insertion of barium endofile into the vacant canal). Perforations -- I think -- weaken the strength of the tooth, causing (sometimes) the gum to move to cover the hole, and represent an entry for cavities. As virtually everything else inside the mouth, perforations mean pain. Teeth get angry from them.

Tomorrow (Friday): more xrays. We'll find out whether or not I need repairs.

39

2007-10-17T20:25:00.001-07:00

4:15 pm - Arrive for 4:30 appt., made yesterday, at NYU School of Dentistry. Corner of 1 Ave. and 24 Street.

4:30 pm - Call from Dentist. He won't show until 5: too many patients at his other job (dealer?)

4:50 pm - Call from Dentist. He isn't coming, swamped with walk-ins.

5:00 pm - Board bus. Get in yelling fight with drunk Dominican man with tattooed hands who insists I was trying to take his seat.

5:00 pm - Tell drunken man I wasn't moving in on "his" seat. Then call drunken man a "cocksucker." Consider telling him he needs treatment for what I hope ends up killing him.

5:00 pm - Keep silent. "...of quiet desperation."

5:01 pm - Move to the rear door of the bus. Stand next to a kid humming a song that I end up inadvertently tapping on my bag.

5:01 pm - Kid looks up at me. His eyes have the same look as mine must've, looking at the "seat" guy.

5:02 pm - Deboard.

P.S.

2007-10-12T22:56:00.000-07:00

So...a bright future awaits.

[P.S. to 40]:

The gagging happens, during the 18 x-rays they take of me during Visit the Second. They place the film into my throat, to get the back molars. Can't they find more flexible film without those damn laminated edges?

"I did not notice the gag reflex last time," Doctor V says, dryly.

My doc (dent?) is knowledgeable (grad student), yet dry. This calm demeanor is a good thing when he's juicing me up, the cutting. His focus is impressive. My jaw's durability is impressive.

When he speaks, he mixes sympathy with the cold seriousness of a messenger. He's trying to scare me into changing my brushing habits. But this is ingrained.

By his account (and after seeing the tally, I'd agree), there are serious "things" happening in my mouth. I'm not sure if these are major "events" or will there be nipple. Should I "secure provisions" or not?

NYU is going to be where I spend a lot of time sitting down.

Five (5) of my fillings will be paid (they PAY me, hourly; unsure of cost) and free of charge. These are exams. Painless? I wouldn't want to owe any of them money when they're bleeding me, that's for sure.

I should mention that I deserve this.

My last dentist visit was 5 years ago: I paid $6000 colones ($20) to a woman in Rohrmoser, San Jose, Costa Rica (2nd best dental care in the world, after the US...dicen que dicen). She rubbed dye on my teeth to locate cavities -- where the dye turns reddish, that's a cavity. I left when she told me she didn't have amalgam to work with.

40 (8:30 a.m.)

2007-10-11T18:19:00.001-07:00

Sitting in the chair. Oh god, these are students! I was setting fire to couches when I was a student. What do they have in mind for the chair I'm in?

Today I'm given:

18 x-rays. Rubber dicks can't even survive this bombardment.

And then the diagnosis:

15 cavities, requiring 15 fillings. Some teeth with what they call, sarcastically, "multiples."

4 root canals needed. "Endodontics," or dildonics. Not sure which.
3 crowns.
2 crown "lengthenings".
And 40 visits in all.
Total: $5,505.00, "Worst case scenario." (His words).